Troy (dir. Wolfgang Petersen, 2004)

Warning: this is a really long post. I have a crazily busy weekend coming up so this is several days’ worth of blogging at once.

OK, here’s how this is going to work. I actually like Troy. I really do. I think it’s fun, it’s suitably tragic, it has lots of hot men in it, I like what they’ve done with the costumes and sets and I think most (though unfortunately not all) of the performances are good. Yes, it’s no classic – it’s no Gladiator. But it’s a good evening out, or it was, when it was in the cinema.

I also have no problem with the fact that the story has been altered. Greek mythology was an ever-changing thing and no two versions were ever the same. Helen, for example, was variously kidnapped, seduced, went off willingly or, in one version, sent off to Egypt for the entire ten-year war while Paris took a phantom image of her to Troy. Every Greek writer adapted the story to suit his (unfortunately it was generally his) own era and culture. I think it’s entirely appropriate to change the story to suit modern audiences. (I am less forgiving when it comes to actual history rather than myth, though even there I am not totally unbending, as my love of Gladiator will tell you.) Having said that, this post will include a lot of commentary on the changes that have been made from Greco-Roman myth and from the Iliad in particular. There are three reasons for this. Firstly, I hope that anyone who is less familiar with Greece and Rome will find the differences interesting. Secondly, the film did, to some extent, market itself as an adaptation of the Iliad, so it seems right to explore just how the story has been adapted. (Though the Iliad only actually covers a tiny fraction of the story, from the taking of Briseis by Agamemnon to the meeting between Priam and Achilles). Thirdly, some of the changes are quite dramatic and while I totally respect the filmmaker’s right to make said changes, it can be a bit jarring on first viewing if you know other versions of the story.

So, disclaimers out of the way, I am going to re-cap, and in places, try to recreate my reactions to the film when I first saw it, five years ago, in the cinema. I was with a group of friends from uni and we were all in the middle of our Ancient History exams...

We open with some exotic wailing, as the soundtrack (by James Horner) tries to be the soundtrack to Gladiator (which was by Hans Zimmer, with Lisa Gerrard).The Bit With The Writing sets out the scene, which has been altered from classical versions. In the traditional myth, Helen had many, many suitors who all vowed to uphold the right of the eventual groom to her hand (and the rest of her). As a result, when Paris abducted her, they were all forced to go and help Menelaus get her back (though some of them went to quite some lengths to try to get out of it – Odysseus pretended to be mad and Achilles lived in drag with a group of maidens – which sounds like an episode of Blackadder to me...). Even in Antiquity, the idea that a great war might be started over a single woman sounded a bit odd and was ripe for mockery by writers like Petronius and Lucan. I really like the solution here – once the situation is set up, and we’ve established the tense peace between Menelaus and Troy and Agamemnon’s ambition, it really does make sense that Paris’ act, which becomes deliberately aggressive in addition to damaging Menelaus’ honour, would kick everything off. The abduction/seduction of Helen becomes the trigger that sets off an already volatile situation, rather than the sole cause of the war.The reference to the ‘emerging Greek nation’ is a bit off though – no such thing at that time.

Mmm, Sean Bean’s voice. Odysseus by way of Sheffield – fab. Also, a neat encapsulation of a major theme of the Iliad – the attempt to win eternal fame and glory through battle.

Brian Cox as Agamemnon – nicely evil. He sends what looks like a hobbit to fetch his best fighter, Achilles, as played by Naked!Brad Pitt. I’ve got nothing against Naked!Brad Pitt, which is very nice to look at, though I could do without the two naked women entwined around him. Unfortunately, his performance as Achilles is as flat and cardboard as a MacDonalds hamburger. Brad Pitt is fine when he’s required to play a good-looking modern man, but between this and his dismal performance in Friends (no comic timing whatsoever) he’s not currently my favourite actor.

The Greeks are wearing some very short skirts indeed – apparently accurate (not my area of expertise!) but a little silly looking. Agamemnon hates Achilles – oooh, Foreshadowing...

Sparta. Mmmm, Eric Bana as Hector. Orlando Bloom as Paris doesn’t look quite as good as he did in The Lord of the Rings, but he’s perfectly cast. Poor Diane Kruger has to look like the most beautiful woman in the world, with a face that launched a thousand ships – an impossible task for any woman. I think she perfectly attractive, but I wouldn’t know really.

Was this the face that launched a thousand ships, and burnt the topless towers of Ilium? (Christopher Marlowe, Dr Faustus)

Her line about how she used to be just a ‘ghost’ sounds really... odd. It sounds very much like something you’d write, not something you’d say. This version goes for an equally passionate love affair on both sides, of course – we’d feel no sympathy for Paris if he was a rapist.

The Trojan costumes look a bit silly too, but they’re such a pretty shade of blue, I forgive them. Mad Eye Moody (Brenden Gleeson as Menelaus) is *very* cross when he finds out what’s happened though, and we see Agamemnon take advantage of that (still keeping it nicely plausible).

Achilles is fighting what looks like a member of Hansen c1995 (otherwise known as Patroclus). The film has, perhaps wisely, sidestepped the debate concerning Achilles and Patroclus’ relationship (the Iliad suggests that Patroclus is older and they’re just good friends, later Classical readings assumed that they were lovers and some made Patroclus the younger, as in this case Achilles would need to be the more macho one. The film makes them cousins – a blood relationship that allows them to depict them as very affectionate without complicating the later romantic subplot with Briseis).

Mmm, Sean Bean. Odysseus wants Achilles to fight to protect his own behind. Achilles checks with his Mum, who’s paddling – is she, as in the Iliad, a sea goddess? Does she just have hot feet? Who can say? She does, however, explain Achilles’ choice – between a long, happy, unknown life and a short, violent, famous one – and Julie Christie is, as ever, great.

Love the shot of the thousand ships. Very cool.

Lawrence of Arabia is Priam, king of Troy. He’s good as ever, though a bit wide-eyed, naive and ineffectual for such a powerful figure. For an even better Peter O’Toole-as-a-king performance, see The Lion in Winter. Briseis has been changed into a priestess of royal birth, presumably to give her a relationship with Priam, Hector and Paris and increase her emotional investment in what happens to them.

Priam expects the gods to do everything for him. Grr. No ancient ruler would actually behave that way (they might tell their people they behaved that way – there’s a difference). On the other hand, this is mythology, so I guess they can do what they want.

Aw, look at how cute little Astyanax is. Sniff...

There’s some random fighting showing how, in this version, Achilles gets hold of Briseis. In traditional myth, the first to disembark on the beaches was killed. James Horner’s music is now channelling his early film score for Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan, and my head is filled with images of the Enterprise and the Reliant flying around a purple nebula and Ricardo Montalban hissing at William Shatner.

Oh – now the score’s turned into Horner’s score for Titanic, and I’m picturing the ship going slowly down while Kate and Leo run for their lives.

They’re still fighting. Ooh, look at the blue of that sea and the heat of the sun... I need to get back to the Med sometime soon...

I think Brad Pitt is doing Joey’s ‘smell the fart acting’ from Friends. Achilles doesn’t respect the gods – I smell a modern writer inflicting his own views on an ancient character. There’s only one Ajax, which is good, as I can never remember which is which out of the Greater and Lesser Ajax. Achilles and Briseis meet. This is a tricky part for the filmmakers. They want their hero, Achilles, to have a (female) love interest, because in our Western culture, heroes always have a love interest. Briseis is the obvious solution, but the traditional story – Achilles kills her father and kidnaps and presumably rapes her and Briseis’ opinion on the matter is never considered, though she mourns when Patroclus dies – would completely destroy any audience sympathy for Achilles. So the two of them walk a fine line, with Achilles as abductor and Briseis as prisoner, trying to avoid implying rape or Stockholm Syndrome in their relationship.

Now we reach the plot of the Iliad as Agamemnon takes Briseis from Achilles and Achilles goes off in a sulk, refusing to fight any more. Then there’s lots of scenes of Helen and Paris feeling guilty. Good – so they jolly well should.

A-ha! Big battle time. Well, almost. The movie hasn’t taken ten years to get here (though it feels like it) so everyone is still just as young and pretty and the armies are at full strength. It’s time for the duel between Paris and Menelaus, which comes to an abrupt end in the Iliad when Aphrodite forcibly whisks Paris away for some hot lovin’ with Helen. Obviously, they’re not going to do that in the movie (the entire divine machinery, the actions of the gods, has been removed, which is wise – modern audiences just wouldn’t buy it in an epic war film, though it might work better in the Odyssey and Jason and the Argonauts just about gets away with it). Ah yes, there goes Paris, running away – wait, what’s Hector doing? What’s going on? OH MY GOODNESS THEY’VE KILLED MENELAUS!

They killed Menelaus! They killed Menelaus! Huh?! How could they DO that? Menelaus is destined to eventually win, get Helen back and go back to live a long, happy life in Sparta – in fact, he ends up better off than any other member of the Greek army (including Odysseus, who has ten extra years of sailing, loses all his crew and still isn’t finished when he gets home). What’s going on? My world is crumbling!!!

OK, so now we know - all bets are off. Up to this point, all the changes have been relatively minor – even things that seem big, like changing Briseis’ social station or Agamemnon’s motives for fighting – haven’t really affected the plot in any truly significant way. But this is a major change – this is becoming a completely different story. Suddenly, I have no idea what’s going to happen next. Paris does correctly grab Hector’s knees in supplication though. Nice touch.

More fighting. Achilles whinges about how they’re doing it wrong. Ajax, whichever one he is, goes down (they’ve killed Menelaus and Ajax? I’m so confused!). I’m also disappointed, as one of my favourite images from the myth (and I’ve temporarily forgotten which version its in – possibly the Odyssey) is of Ajax (presumably the Greater one) carrying Achilles’ dead body out of the battle while Odysseus fights off anyone who comes near them. It’s an honour thing. (Followed by fighting and suicide. That’s Greeks for you).

Achilles rescues Briseis. Homer would have thought that was very strange (in the poem, his problem with Agamemnon taking her is that its an affront to his honour, not that he cares about her). They hadn’t invented chivalry in archaic Greece. Sex follows, still trying to walk the fine line that keeps it romantic and not extremely dubious. Briseis obviously wasn’t terribly attached to her vows of celibacy.Mmm, Sean Bean is back.

Mmm, Sean Bean

Hansen member c1995 is having a patriotic moment (about an as yet non-existent country). So he steals Achilles’ armour, goes off to fight, and gets himself killed by Hector. His death is really nasty, all gurgling blood – yuck.

Big sulks from Achilles. He doesn’t cry for his mummy though. My favourite bits from the Iliad are the sections he spends hanging around on the beach, weeping and asking his Mum to solve all his problems for him (Zeus owes her a favour apparently). Hmpf.

Hector shows Andromache a way out and explains what traditionally happened to her in Greek myth – Astyanax was thrown off the walls and she was taken as a slave. Unfortunately, we don’t get to see the beautifully tragic scene from the Iliad where the baby is frightened by Hector, in his armour and helmet, but never mind. Orlando remembers what he can do (shoot things) and goes back in to Legolas mode.

Mmm, shirtless Eric Bana. All leading up to the tragic duel between Hector and Achilles – tragic because, no matter what version of the story we’re in, Hector is ten times more sympathetic than Achilles but Achilles always wins. The fight itself looks pretty well done to me, but I’m not a very good judge of these things (I switch off during fight sequences, except for the ones in Gladiator, which are more interesting).

Achilles defiles Hector’s body and Priam comes to see him to beg for it to be returned, and we’ve reached Book 24 of the Iliad. Peter O’Toole is excellent. Brad Pitt looks constipated. He does finally cry though. Priam takes Briseis back with him, which an ancient Greek so would not do – she’s damaged goods now after all.

We’re moving into the last part of the film now, and Odysseus has his bright idea (‘well we all jump out of the rabbit – Lancelot, Galahad and I...’) There’s just no getting away from the fact that Priam has to be spectacularly stupid here – ‘Beware Trojans, they’re complete smegheads!’

Beware Trojans, they're complete smegheads!

And so we come to the destruction of Troy. O’Toole can’t quite match the sheer tragic power of John Gielgud and Judi Dench’s two seconds in Kenneth Branagh’s Hamlet, but he does pretty well.

Andromache leads a small group of the young and the old, including Helen, to her secret escape route. Paris finds a young man called Aeneas helping his old father out, and gives him the sword of Troy and tells him to lead their people! Hehe! Go Aeneas! – and all five of us giggle with glee. The rest of the cinema, who probably haven’t read the Aeneid, stay silent and look over at us, wondering what’s so funny. Andromache and little Astyanax get away – hooray!

Agamemnon attacks Briseis at an altar and Achilles kills him. We’re miles away from Greek myth now, though the incident does strongly recall the rape of Cassandra at an altar. Paris thinks Achilles is attacking Briseis and shoots him, fist of all in the heel – nice touch. That’s a bit closer to the usual version too, though at the end, Paris is still alive and Agamemnon is dead – this is not the usual way round, though it is much more satisfying.

And one last time – mmm, Sean Bean. He calls Hector ‘tamer of horses’, his poetic epithet – very cool. The credit says ‘inspired by the Iliad’, which seems fair. Weird song though, presumably an attempt to get an Oscar nomination. If only this movie had been better received, they might have made the Odyssey with Sean Bean in it, and I would really like to see that. I guess I’ll just have to go watch The Fellowship of the Ring for the umpteenth time instead...

View of Ithaca, Odysseus' home, from Kefalonia

*It has come to my attention that Briseis may have killed Agamemnon. It was pretty late by the time I got to that bit and I wasn't paying attention. Either way, Clytemnestra and Aegisthus are going to be disappointed.